Standing back up

I've officially made it a month! November 1st marked a month since I started this journey for myself. Instead of welcoming that day with the feeling of accomplishment though, I instead felt defeat. On the 29th I went out to celebrate Halloween with my friends, I had the most amazing time but I definitely felt it the week following that night. I was disappointed in myself, knowing that I had potentially un-done everything good that I had done that week. I didn't feel well at the beginning of the week either I felt like I needed lots of carbs and bad food. For some reason I felt like that was the only thing that would take the dizziness away. My normal diet wasn't enough for my body following Saturday night. Instead of choosing to eat healthier food in larger portions I made the bad decision of fatty, fast food.

As of Tuesday I finally started feeling better and went back to eating the way that I should have been all along. Although, I ate better starting Tuesday I lost my drive to workout. However, at the end of the week I only managed to gain one pound as of this morning after everything was said and done. While gaining a pound isn't a good thing, considering the week I had I was really suprised. My dad encouraged me this morning to not give up just because I had a bad week, but instead to take that and work harder this week. I will definitely take his advice and remember the goal that I have set for myself, I refuse to give up on this, I refuse to give up on myself.

This time around I have found the determination that I have been searching for, for a long time. Although, I had a bad week I was encouraged by my ability to stand back up and fight harder to reach my goal. Anytime before that I would eat badly, not workout and gain weight I was like, "Eh, I don't wanna do this anymore, bad food is too good!" I am also encouraged by watching the biggest loser, my favorite contestant is Sunny! I just love her! She had a bad week two weeks ago and gained 5 lbs but then last week she lost 9! I remember her saying that she was discouraged from the week before because she hadn't done anything to make herself gain that weight so she did have that feeling of, "Will doing this even work for me?" Instead of giving into that feeling though she just powered through the week ahead and pulled out a big number! Her journey has inspired me and I feel like I'm doing this whole thing right along with her.

So my goal ahead is to loose 20 lbs by Thanksgiving. I know that may seem a little unrealistic, but believe me, I will not take any unhealthy route in reaching that goal. Ultimately, whatever I end up weighing on that Thursday is an accomplishment because I'll know that I did everything I possibly could have. I just want to set the 20lb goal for something to aim for. I also intend to work my tookus off this week at the gym! I can do this, I've got this. I may have times of failure still ahead but the important thing is, I will still be able to get back up. Also, I don't plan on drinking again for a VERY long time!

My obsession this week:

FiberOne brownies! Those little buggers are 90 calories of heaven! They also have 5 grams of fiber in them. They are super delicious and assist in that little umpth to get you until your next meal.